teaching & writing (...trans/formation ongoing...)


~~~~~ sliding scale donation-based ~~~~~

~~~~~ individual & group collections of writing available ~~~~~

positive sex (link to excerpts and selected information & activities)

~~~~~ tentatively titled alternative human sexuality textblog co-authored with Susan Rahman, Ph.D. ~~~~~

~~~~~ click on each link below to navigate to individual chapters ~~~~~

~~~~~ river circle donation required for full text ~~~~~

the art of asking directions

poem written in January 2013 about finding a voice to ask for directions when feeling lost [blog entry September 2, 2015]

feeling lucky; or, embodying radical presence

Kremer_Jackson_Paton_EA_RJP_Feeling lucky

coming out to Danielle

riff I wrote for a dear friend telling her of my trans & poly identities

be(com)ing trans

personal context of my trans/formation from monogamous androgynous heterosexual male to trans-identified polyamorous person

writing about prostitutes

riff written about pornography and the shadowy underbelly of sex

what is love?

riff addressing what might be… attraction, lust, eros, friendship, sensuality

choosing a benefit package

riff about the various ways to be friends, kinda like choosing insurance with all kinds of benefits possible

the elusive third; or, how swinging saved my marriage

riff about a theoretical polyamorist choosing to remain in a monogam-ish relationship where swinging and threesomes become helpful, insightful, fun, liberating…

howling about true love

riff about the eternity and varieties of love [includes images]

embodying tenderness

riff accompanying visual art countering the misogyny and internalized hate of date rape

a fool’s vulnerability

riff on how taking risks is scary and necessary for trans/formation in personal life and beyond. Such foolish or risky behavior requires courage (from the French for heart!), and vulnerability

the androgyny of both/and

riff about connection and relationship within self and with others that breaks down gender and relationship binaries

the cast of characters?

riff about how the different close friends/lovers see me and meet me in unique and incomparable ways

looking for a one

reflection on openness to a fluid experience of true love, as opposed to the scarcity model of THE one…

a gift’s curse; or, a curse’s gift?

personal reflection on my gift to connect with people and how my sense of boundaries must be constantly negotiated

breaking ourselves open

reflection on how the challenges of negotiating various relationships has opened me and jenny and others more; breaking hearts in order to heal them

fluid binaries; or, meditations on shaving my legs

reflection on the complications of gender binaries, as i am aware of my outward appearance in some ways reinforcing feminine stereotypes

sensual somatics

reflection on how somatics brought me a deeper sense of sensual expression, reinforcing that fluid boundaries in sexuality and relationships are really the way for me

the gravity of love

“Two come together to create a third. It’s the energy between that holds them both.” ~~~ Onetaste

reflection in response to Interstellar, about how love is eternal, constant and thus allows for an openness and certainty in the face of so much confusion. this critiques the scarcity model in love.

(un)conscious attraction and touch

a reflection on how it’s not varieties of attraction and love that are ‘problematic’ but the lack of consciousness, and intentionality. I propose conscious touch, knowing and accepting that sometimes unconsciousness will or needs to occur. Rather than denying that and pushing it to our personal and social shadows, touch it too! I’ll respond to the concern about ‘anything goes?’

open secrets

a reflection on negotiating the boundaries of open communication. is it ever possible to be completely open with someone, is it even a good idea? Is it possible to move trust and faith away from an individual person and into the relationship process?

varieties of touch

informed by yoga and somatics teaching, I reflect on there are many kinds of touch, including but not limited to sensual, sexual depending on the people involved, and their connections

open to possibility: or, collaboration with the unknown

reflection on how collaboration and innovation and openness are hailed in many areas of society, yet in the realm of sexuality and relationships, it’s dismissed and rejected


books in the works…

  • coming into the open (a creative journey through the process of moving into non-monogamy co-created with my spouse-for-life Jenny Jackson-Paton);
  • are you being served? servers we’ve known and… (erotica written with Jenny)…

this being erotica, it is understood that you are of age, you are open, and you can view this material respectfully…

~~~~~ this is an overview table of contents. click this link to go to the erotica page. ~~~~~

~~~~~ some links will take you to pdfs, and outside websites ~~~~~


consider this foreplay…

Jen and River were walking up the street deeply engaged in conversation. Jen was wearing a loose-fitting V-neck t-shirt without a bra. By most measures, her breasts were beautiful. River stopped short, and said, “Sometime I just really want to kiss you. How about here?” pulling Jen into an alcove off the sidewalk. River pressed up against her, kissing her deeply. Her shirt barely covered her breasts, offering River the opportunity to touch them, circling her nipples, cupping them gently. “My pussy aches,” Jen moaned. River’s hand slid to her crotch…


lapping up the dances

[In July 2015 I began an erotic serial for a friend to send in short teasing texts.]

This story, like the fantasy it describes has no introduction; we go directly to the bedroom. Given how much she undresses for work, we undress her, leaving only her g-string in place. After pulling off her top, river asks about braiding her lovely hair. “If only to keep it out of the way, as we play,” they say with a wink and a smile… to be continued…


can I get you anything else?


A scoop of transformation (Lusty lit submission to Liberator blog)


trying it on

August 2013

I love to shop with my wife Jenny for anything and everything but my absolute favorite is when she needs new ‘foundation.’ This is her euphemism for fancy bras and underwear, usually requiring a trip to Victoria’s Secret. Certainly one way to get me frisky. It’s not just the shapely women, fantasizing about the women trying things on, or even the flirty looks. No, I get frisky because Jenny and I love to go into the dressing rooms together to play around.


2 muses are better than one

warm champagne & hot bodies


works in process

doggy sitting

the photo shoot

sexy rock n roll

washing her whites

nap time: shower while baby sleeps 

skirting boundaries

right between the thighs

rest stop; 

hi Sierra; 

colleagues with benefits;

like a good neighbor

cabin fever!

fill er up

let’s play

making adjustments

skirting boundaries

taking pictures

multiple choice


~~~~~ free 20-minute consultation ~~~~~

 ~~~~~ small group (5 -15) workshops: $125 per hour ~~~~~

 ~~~~~ larger group (> 15) presentations: $100 per hour  ~~~~~

ethnoautobiography as socially engaged imagination

with chris boyd (overmanarts)

march 2105 society for humanistic psychology chicago

(Re)defining relationships: Maintaining true love amid fluid boundaries

march 2015 lecture at college of marin, kentfield, ca

pdf of slides are here: river_attraction_com

pdf of 2-page flyer here: attraction flyer_v2


  critical ethnic studies association chicago   white privilege.          

  lectures.   discussions.
  sensual somatics.   twisted painting.   en/gendering movement.

contact river

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River Jackson-Paton, Ph.D.

9441 Folkstone Road Dallas, TX 75220

[email protected]